When Hitler died and went to heaven, he arrived at the pearly gates to be greeted by Jesus. Upon noticing who was infront of him Jesus was astonished. "What in the name of all that's holy are you doing here?" Said jesus. Hitler replied with "I know ze furher has nein been good on ze earth, but I dont vant to burn in ze hell.".. Jesus absoloutley gobsmacked said "there is no way you are getting in here, and if I could let you in our father would be furious." "If you can get God to let me... in heaven, I vill give you zis iron cross I vas avarded in ze first vorld var." Said Hitler. Jesus who was always the compassionate type went off to find god. "Father" he said. " you will not guess who.is asking permission to enter heaven....... Adolf Hitler. "Tell him to decend to the deepest pits of hell where he deserved to be" snorted God, "that man is beyond forgiveness". Jesus quickly replied with " but father he has promised me his iron cross if you let him in". God looked at jesus straight in the eye and said "fuck off son, I gave you a wooden one and you couldn't carry that on your own".